Awright
Jonothon Starsmore furnaceface
@ 2016-07-17 21:11:00
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Hannibal's House (That Jono Has Never Been a Pony In), Sunday Evening
Jono was tired. Jono was tired, and cranky, and he had a lollipop sticking out of his hair, a pocket full of bottlecaps and small seashells, an actual pirate cutlass from the seventeenth century at his hip, a bright blue frog on one shoulder, three Pokémon gym badges (he'd bid a fond farewell to the Vulpix, Raticate, and Ekans he'd won them with when he caught his connecting portal out of Vermillion), a whole array of paint splatters across his clothing, a small armload of rare records on vinyl, a sunburn, and a complimentary voucher in his pocket for one free Portalocity trip, provided he booked his arrangements within the week.

He'd get Hannibal to use it for him. Provided the tie-dye underwear he was wearing under his not-so-usual getup didn't get him kicked out of the house.

It had been A Trip, okay?

//So,// he said, stepping through the front door and immediately looking for somewhere to deposit the frog, //you first.//

[OOC: I'm baaaaaaaack. Some of Jono's assorted nonsense might be inspired by actual events. Mostly the sunburn. Mostly for Hannibal, but I'm around for other threads if there are visitors!]
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never_dull

2016-07-18 01:34 am (UTC) (Link)

Hannibal had no more candy or chocolate in his hair, by dint of transforming back from a pony and then taking a very long shower and bath. He was still in his robe and pajamas, with a really large glass of wine by his side.

Beethoven was up on a shelf, still suspicious that the blue pony was going to come back. He didn't even care that Joni was curled up on his back.

Everything in the house was slightly askew from having been floating for most of a day and then returned unceremoniously to the ground.

And Hannibal's tax return form 8283 for charitable donations was sitting on the coffee table. He hadn't gotten around to returning it to the office yet.

For Hannibal, this was pretty damn close to chaos.

He looked Jono over, grimaced at the paint and lollipop, and got up to greet him.

"I thought you couldn't get burnt?"
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furnaceface

2016-07-18 01:42 am (UTC) (Link)

//Oh, I can get burned,// Jono muttered, wrinkling his nose and deciding to find a new home for Hendrix in a minute. //I just don't tend to burn myself.//

Anymore.

He held his arms open for a hug, anyway. Chaotic as everything seemed to be, it was good to be home. Doubly good that his fiance didn't appear to have hooves.
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never_dull

2016-07-18 02:37 am (UTC) (Link)

Hannibal hugged him, albeit a bit wary of the stickiness and the frog. "I see your trip wasn't entirely bad." He nodded toward the stack of vinyl.

"You seem to need a shower almost as much as I did. An entire week of layovers?"
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furnaceface

2016-07-18 02:42 am (UTC) (Link)

//Layovers and the worst kind of commuting in order to make connections,// Jono mumbled, clinging for a moment.

Hendrix (possibly Hendrix four or five, considering the brief stint with goldfish in high school and the frogs he'd kept at the Boards for a while) was mostly just interested in supervising from his perch atop one of the now rainbow metallic studs in Jono's jacket.

//Remind me that I care about those children enough to risk that ever happening again? And then tell me about your week.//
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never_dull

2016-07-18 03:22 am (UTC) (Link)

"You care about them, and I will be booking your portals from now on," Hannibal said firmly. He raised an eyebrow at the blue frog. "You seem to have a passenger. Sentient, intentional, dinner, or all of the above?"

He'd had A Week. He wasn't bothering with subtle right now.
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furnaceface

2016-07-18 03:33 am (UTC) (Link)

Jono glanced sidelong at the frog. The frog... sat there. Hendrix was made for perching, and had little interest in doing much else, unless there was a fly involved.

//Just a frog, mostly unintentional, but by the time I realized he'd hitched a ride, I'd already left Australia.// He shrugged the shoulder that wasn't currently occupied by frog. //He was the part of the stopover there that I didn't mind so much. The sunburn is the unpleasant souvenir. No eating Hendrix.//

He kind of appreciated how straightforward Hannibal was being, anyway.
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never_dull

2016-07-18 03:49 am (UTC) (Link)

"Hendrix?" Hannibal asked. He sighed and carefully lifted the frog from Jono's shoulder. "I'll put him out on the porch away from the cats until you decide to let him go or get him a terrarium." Because he knew you, Jono. Once you'd named the frog, it probably wasn't going anywhere.

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furnaceface

2016-07-18 03:54 am (UTC) (Link)

At least Hendrix was a fairly placid frog? Now he was sitting on Hannibal's hand, intrigued by this new development in a very mellow froggy sort of way.

//... Good plan. I'll have to go out tomorrow, find something to put him in that he'll be more happy in.//

Yeah, sorry, Hannibal. Jono was keeping the frog.

//He's practically furniture, anyway.//

But he was Jono's furniture, and that was what really mattered.
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never_dull

2016-07-18 04:08 am (UTC) (Link)

Hannibal's furniture took less effort. And much less feeding.

"I doubt Beethoven would appreciate that argument. Or that either of them would appreciate being sat upon by the other."

So it was the porch with you for now, Hendrix.

"At least it isn't raining chocolate and hailing candy anymore."
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furnaceface

2016-07-18 10:12 am (UTC) (Link)

//... He doesn't like chocolate and candy,// Jono noted, shaking his head in bemusement. //Or little orange men who are prone to breaking into song when something goes awry.//

Lessons learned.

//So... things really were mad here, weren't they? I don't think I've ever seen this place in such a state before.//
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never_dull

2016-07-18 11:39 pm (UTC) (Link)

"Orange men?" Hannibal set Hendrix on the porch and came back inside to wash his hands. "We had soap streets, chocolate rain, floating buildings, rabbits with giraffe legs, a maze in the park, and we were all ponies. Or some variation thereof."

Unable to let it go any longer, he plucked the lollipop from Jono's hair and tossed it in the garbage. "And you?"
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furnaceface

2016-07-18 11:47 pm (UTC) (Link)

//Orange men,// Jono mumbled, watching Hannibal throw the lollipop away. //Oompa-something. One of my stopovers was in the most bloody ridiculous... who the hell puts a Portalocity lounge in a chocolate factory?//

It was possible that he was mostly bitter that he couldn't sample any.

//Portals I had to hike on foot between towns to get to- I spent three bloody weeks in a place where people had perfected cockfighting with basically any species of animal they came across. If you have never seen a butterfly take out a giant snake made out of stone, I promise you, it's one hell of a sight.//

There was video on his phone. Maybe he'd show Hannibal later.
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never_dull

2016-07-19 12:23 am (UTC) (Link)

"Three weeks?" Hannibal frowned. "How long have you been gone from your perspective?"
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furnaceface

2016-07-19 12:32 am (UTC) (Link)

//'Bout a month and a half,// Jono grumbled. //Would've been longer, but I threatened to do some fairly unsavoury things to one gnome's mother, and he fast-tracked me out of-// he went a bit flat before saying, //Neverland. A week early.//

He really, really hated that place's name.
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never_dull

2016-07-19 12:35 am (UTC) (Link)

Hannibal paused. "Your Neverland? Or another place with that name?"
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furnaceface

2016-07-19 12:48 am (UTC) (Link)

//Another place with that name,// Jono mumbled. //You know, like in the stories? That's the one. Mermaids and pirates and so on.//

He shook his head.

//Wasn't so bad, I suppose. Got a cutlass and a pocket full of seashells for my trouble. Not... sure quite what to do with the shells, admittedly.//
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never_dull

2016-07-19 12:56 am (UTC) (Link)

"Give them to the flamingos," Hannibal suggested. "The sword may come in handy some day, though."

He reached out to take Jono's colorfully-studded jacket. "If I'd known it had been that long, I might have gone to Portalocity myself. There didn't seem much point with the oddities here as well."

Not to mention he wasn't nearly as intimidating as a blue pony.
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furnaceface

2016-07-19 01:04 am (UTC) (Link)

//It's fine,// Jono replied, carefully shrugging out of the jacket. The sunburn made lifting his arms into an unpleasant experience, but it wasn't as though he hadn't felt worse, either. //I've been through worse, but a weekly commute shouldn't take longer than the time I spent in Westchester in the first place.//
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never_dull

2016-07-19 01:38 am (UTC) (Link)

"It certainly shouldn't." Hannibal hung the jacket up for later cleaning, then shook his head at Jono's shirt. It went with the sword, he supposed. "How far down are you sunburnt?"
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furnaceface

2016-07-19 01:44 am (UTC) (Link)

//Mostly my shoulders,// Jono sighed. //But it goes right down my back as well. There's a story there, but mostly that story is, 'the gnomes confused the complimentary sunblock for that particular stopover with coconut oil.' I smelled amazing as I burned.//

Sure, it had some SPF going on, but he might as well have just wrapped himself in aluminium foil and baked himself like a potato in that heat.
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never_dull

2016-07-19 01:57 am (UTC) (Link)

Hannibal grimaced. "I still have that cream I used for your headaches; it should help with this as well."

Joni, finally realizing that was really her human home, scrambled to dive from the shelf to his shoulder, and Hannibal interrupted her, earning himself a pathetic mew as he held her up to meet Jono instead.
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furnaceface

2016-07-19 02:03 am (UTC) (Link)

Jono blinked, and then gave a little corners-of-the-eyes smile as he reached one hand up somewhat to scratch Joni behind the ears.

//With reflexes like that, careful,// he said, jokingly. //They'll try to put you in a costume with an X on it yet.//
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never_dull

2016-07-19 02:21 am (UTC) (Link)

"When they're only fighting cats her size, they can talk to me," Hannibal said wryly. He let her have her scritches, then set her gently down.

"Do you have any other surprises?" he asked.
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furnaceface

2016-07-19 02:36 am (UTC) (Link)

//Only the voucher for the free trip,// Jono replied, a touch wryly. //Which you're welcome to, because lord knows I'm not in any rush to travel Portalocity again. I'm calling in sick this week, Logan can find somebody else to teach my class after all that.//
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never_dull

2016-07-19 02:54 am (UTC) (Link)

"For the next three weeks," Hannibal suggested, "since that's how long you've been gone."

He tugged at the sleeve of Jono's...pirate blouse. "Why don't you get undressed, and I'll pour a beer and meet you by the tub?"
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furnaceface

2016-07-19 03:03 am (UTC) (Link)

The blouse and the cutlass would be great around Halloween, though. Very authentic look for Flamebeard the pirate.

//That sounds fantastic,// Jono admitted. //I'm absolutely up for every bit of that suggestion.//

And not just to get the leftover lollipop gunk out of his hair.
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never_dull

2016-07-20 01:01 am (UTC) (Link)

Hannibal smiled and squeezed Jono's hand, then went to get the beer.
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